Her Service...
Nicole's funeral was so sad and I still was in complete shock and I begged everyone around me to not make me go in there and see her and Jarred. They placed their casket's together and they were so beautiful. Nicole's shimmering blonde hair was down and somewhat wavy and curly.

Jarred was somewhat smiling and he looked so peacful they were in heaven together why didnt I help them through this. Why did I do this. This is all my fault!! Poor Nicole I should have known something was wrong!! VERY WORNG!! She didn't need to do this!

I had no idea this could happen to such a wonderful girl and boy. I was waiting for them to get married and be together thats what they deserved not this!!

I cried and kissed both of them on the cheek and fixed my baby's hair. I touched her face which was so very cold! I kissed her once more and stayed with her which seemed to be only a few minutes but really it was two hours. After that visitation was over and they transported her to church where they had the service. I cried so much through this. We proceded to the grave yard where they were lowering her and Jarred into the ground.

I wanted to scream stop and grab her out of the casket and yell wake up and she would!! But she was really gone! I was scared she was mistaken to be dead and wasnt really gone!! It haunted me forever but tests proved it she was gone!!

After they were buried... I always went there everyday with flowers or something for them both.

Not a day goes by with out the pain!! I MISS THEM SO MUCH!!!!! ANYONE CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE THINK AGIAN SAVE YOUR FAMILY THE GRIEF!!!